Panic attack

Logged in to my FB minutes ago..and at a glance i saw on the side.. " The Engagement Photoshoot" adn below i saw her name.. I got a heart attack,almost cried.. Clicked into it and come to realised it wasnt it.. It was someone else's photo album.. Went back to my page and saw..its just commented on it by "her" Gosh~ but i felt a smile on my face..relieved... Gosh panic attack..

but well its just a matter of time i guess.....God~ i cant do this anymore...

Steven Kim~

OMG...I dreamt of him this morning..... I never thought about him at all last night..how come i will suddenly dreamt about him?? But it's kinda sweet in the dream.. I remember waking up and when i fell back to sleep..the dream kinda continued.. Its kinda weird..but i woke up smilling..

Gosh~

Imaginary world

Sometimes i wonder if everyone will have their own imaginary world.. I know i do have one. I remember asking this question once to Mindy. She told me she once have as well..but after entering working world..she has got no time to think of it.

Well..now that im in the corporate world as well...but my imaginary world is still within me.. But at times it makes me happy, it cheered me up..sometimes i cry out of it..sometimes i feel im crazy imagining things and talking to myself..at times i feel im having depression..


I remember "Hoi Long Wong" told me to just be myself.. But Who am i?? How am i supposed to be?? Im confused~ After watching 'Shoppaholic', there's parts where i kinda relate to myself. Her post part where it's something she has deep down inside her..so call real thoughts??.. and also the parts where the manequins were "talking-reacting-greetings-watever-its-called" towards her. Well, i dont "talk" to manequins. i dont have one particular imaginary friend. I have different scenarios, with different people, at different places. My storys goes here and there. I doesnt have a beginning nor any ending. It can comes and goes anytime anywhere.

The qs : Am i mentally ill??

I feels like a wandered spirit going about looking for the "best" body to fit in. perhaps for me..the "best" character to fit in..

Shoppaholic

Mel...Rebecca Bloomwood...hahaha suddenly i recalled~ after all the bollywood..afterwood..watever wood i thought off...kakaka

Painful on ex's wedding

As the 3 of us was walking in to the banquet hall, S was greeting us from inside. That's where A turn and told us " this is the time where i'm going to my ex's wedding dinner". She ended the sentence with a smile on her beautiful fully make-up face. Ouch~ was what came to my mind. Gosh~ She's still stable and calm..pretend to be??

I knew S and A been very close frens. Never did i thought there's another "secret-thingy" previously. As we were rushing down to the destination, i was following V's car but i can sense that A is driving anxiously. I only thought that because S is her very good close fren, so she doesnt wants to loose out even on the brother's wedding. What scare me most is when she almost hit a motorcyclist. Luckily the motor manage to stop on time.

After lead us to the dinner table, noticed the newly wedds were smilling their way inside the grand-ly decorated table (something like in a cage). Our table was just next to the bride and groom. Wow~ so near.. As there was stage performance.. and soon it was time where all weddings will do. Lovey dovey moments how the couple grew up-met each other-love blooms-leading to marriage.. I turned and saw A.. watery sparkling big eyes.. Sigh~ Suddenly i felt like hugging her and tell her its alright..

The night ended not too long since we arrived. Congrads the newly weds and thanked S for inviting us eventhough it was the brother's wedding and yet i only knew her and not the brother..

I wonder if i was ever invited to my ex's wedding.. Would i think back all the sweet times?? Would i remember all the hatered?? Would i cry?? Will i feel Ouch?? What will i do? How would i react?? I guess.........i'll have flashes back somehow..be it sweet or bitter...but i dont think i will miss them dearly already..I've get over them.

Huggies to my dear fren A~

Island to release Un Neccessary Stress

Another day wasted. Kinda regretted never went back to office to do my things. I know it sounds crazy..but..well watodo..later i will have "un-neccessary stress". I know i kept using this word these days. But wat to do~ really causes me UN-NECESSARY STRESS!!!! feels like screaming my lungs out...

Talking bout that. I suddenly remembered i was really screaming my lungs out while playing pirate ship back in Hong Kong. I remembered the 1st when i play inside a mall, i was screaming too. 2nd time was the flying carpet in Sunway Lagoon, was screaming as well... and everytime i played that, i kept telling myself it would be the last time i'm ever gona scare the shit out of myself..No Guts!!! Eventually....4th time?? Erm~~

I'm moved to a new place in office. It's so much nearer to my boss and her boss...my god...feels so uneasy.. Next week my boss is back after a weeks leave...luck i oni c her on monday then i'll go on leave..weekend i dont see her as well...keke..

Can barely wait to go to the island..Something came to my mind as well when we planned to go to the island..Thts where 'they' met each other..Thts where they started.. Thoe i know they are both back here..but...somethings there...Sigh~

等你老了都等...即使 終於與她 成親

Out of the blue..since the last i post something up,today i just felt like posting something up..mayb having too many thoughts in mind, i tried logging in with my usual email add. Manatau, no matter how many times i tried...i just cant seems to get it thoe. It keep asking me to create a new blog.. Somehow another, suddenly just at the back of my mind,something popped up.. Hahaha..i was laughing to myself.. STU me!!! its another email address la...hahaha..Too STRESS?? Perhaps perhaps..


San San came telling me "Eh..there's a song Marc told me.i think you will like alot..its very sad the lyrics..but i think really represents u alot..how you feel.."

Me : "reli..ok i must listen then"

San San : " Janice's 你知道我在等你們分手嗎?"

Me : "Wah..oi meh..i never think like tht bor"

San San : "you listen 1st la..the lyrics very sad de..u sure will like de"


And so..i search for the song..Sigh~ serious neh..i love the song..


衛蘭 - 你知道我在等你們分手嗎





歌詞 :

未妒忌　別妒忌

我很關心 你跟她　相處得稱心嗎 沒任何衝突嗎
不過　不過　想補充一句 (我哋開頭都係咁架喇)
如果她有福氣　

未妒忌　別妒忌
讓我暫時地祝賀你
等你　分離　隨時準備
誰人來殘酷報喜

知你 無本心　有日 到她死心
我未會灰心　不怕受過的 教訓
願意在 呆等　不忠愛人
回頭負你 責任　知你
曾花心　愛著你很驚心　卻又覺開心
得我願意受你 苦困
我為何肯　等個舊人

誰叫我　不甘心　等到怕了 都等
等等等 還等　忍忍忍 仍忍


我很清楚 你的家　她 可知那梳化
是共誰選擇 嗎　
可笑　可怕　只敢想一下 (可能你會返嚟呢)
如她給你拋棄

別顧忌　別顧忌
尚有 笨人在 等待你
等你　分離　又再一起
猶如輪班去就你

知你 無本心　有日 到她死心
我未會灰心　不怕受過的 教訓
願意在 呆等　不忠愛人
回頭負你 責任　知你
曾花心　愛著你 很驚心　卻又覺開心
得我願意受你 苦困
我為何 肯　等個舊人

還錯過　多少的　親 吻
內疚 地　耐心 地　靜盼愛反悔的你
你似是和她　朝晚未離
我也有信心 等你

等你　尋開心　最後變出 傷心　我便會開心
可以又再被 你幽禁
我為何 肯　等個 舊人
誰叫 我　不甘心　等你老了都等

即使 終於 與她　成親